?

My mind is racing. It won't stop, jumping from one thing to the next. Should I go this way, or would it be better if I do that? Where will I end up? Where will I go? Should I consider more places? Should I do something else? Is this all I can do? Is there more? Should I put up with this shit? Should I put up with people who make me stress? If I didn't talk to anyone for a week would you wonder why? Would you still care? Do you still care?

I can't sleep. I can't wake up. My mind is racing; it won't stop.

1 in, 51 to go

You would never guess it could happen, but it does. On occasion, time stands still. Most people never experience this phenomenon, but it happens. The strangest part of life since the hurricane is that my life was on hold and started again a few months later but in overdrive where I had to play catch up.

I left New Orleans on August 27, 2005 for a weekend trip to visit some friends far enough away from the coast to avoid a hurricane. I returned two months later, October 27, 2005.

Looking back, it's still surreal. Friday, August 26th, Heather came in to my office and told me to look up the hurricane path. I pulled up NOAA, looked at the map, and laughed. Hurricane Katrina was headed directly for New Orleans. This was the same hurricane that sat on top of Miami for a few days as a category 1 and let out a ton of rain earlier in the week. It was supposed to continue into the Gulf of Mexico and up to the Florida panhandle. Obviously, that didn't happen. I was completely amused that the hurricane picked freshmen move-in day to come to New Orleans. My boss, Missie, had already left for the day, and knowing that she got special university hurricane updates, I called to see if she had any info. She didn't at the time, but told me she'd let the staff know what she found out. Normally Reily becomes the hurricane opperation center for the campus and a small shelter for TUPD, facilities services, and their families. It's typically a great way to get a little extra money and not have to worry about staying alone in my house for the storm. Typically, the storm shifts and never comes close to New Orleans. Oh, to be typical.

Friday night I went out to happy hour with some friends, still not deciding if I was going to take a long weekend to see some friends or stay at Reily. Saturday morning I checked the noaa.com and saw that the hurricane had strengthened to a category 4 with a strong likelihood of becoming a 5. I went to babysit Peter and Isabella, still not having decided what to do. By 10am, I decided to make a weekend trip to see McCann and Justing up at Ole Miss. I knew I didn't have to be back at work until Wednesday, so I decided to have fun with my unexpected time off. I threw a couple of days worth of stuff into my suitcase, unplugged a few things, put gas in my car, and set off to Oxford, MS.

The hurricane hit and followed me to Oxford. Then the levees broke.

Septemeber 1, 2005 I left Oxford with the same clothes I had packed and drove to Columbia. Time stood still, and I waited. I waited to find out if my friends were ok. I waited to find out if my stuff was ok. I waited to find out what would happen to my life. I found out water was on my street and Tulane was flooded. Classes were cancelled for the semester, and employees would not return to work any time soon.

Finally, I received word that I still had my job and, even better, I would still get paid while I was in Columbia. I also heard that while my house was ok, a few friends lost theirs completely. Around, life continued for my family and friends, but I was still in limbo. Not knowing for sure what was to come. I studied for the GRE (not that you would know based on my score), volunteered at the Home Work Center, took a few trips (Charlotte, Wisconsin, NYC), and generally bummed around.

October 27th, 2005, with my parents blessing but hesitations, I drove back to New Orleans. Time started again but with a two month gap. I tore off two months worth of pages from the calendar on my desk. I attempted to call the number of the vendor we needed for Reily Rocks listed in my dayplanner only to find it disconnected. I found bills on my desk from the summer. Everything was exactly where I had left it; time had stood still.

Slowly, life is coming back to the city. We are once again preparing for the students to return to Tulane (I'll believe it when the day comes this time). Stops signs are being replaced with working traffic lights (still not at Earhart and Carrolton though!). Flood debris has been replaced by debris from house gutting.

My desire to be in the city fluctuates week to week. My initial excitement about being back in the city left me long ago, but I'm hoping the return of the students will also bring me some excitement. So far, i'm still waiting. I think the worst is behind, at least I hope. If nothing else, I only have to last a few more months. If grad school turns out to be a bust, I don't know what I'll do but it will force me to make some decisions. Most likely a decision still to leave. New Orleans-always in my heart even if I miss it while I'm still in the city.

And the winner is . . .

And the winner is a 2004 Honda Civic Coupe (black). Yeah, yeah.

The Car Quest

The Quest: to find and buy a car in approximately 24 hours. Can it be done? Yes, but probably not as thoroughly as in maybe 48 hours. I don't like to think of myself as spoiled, but let's face it, I am. Private school from birth, nice house, nice clothes. I haven't handed everything I wanted on a silver platter, but I've never been lacking in nicities either. All in all, I've lived a pretty nice life. When I was a junior in high school, my parents gave me use of one of our two family cars one day a week. For Christmas my senior year in high school, I got custody of one of the cars. A 1993 Acura legend, which by Christmas of 1999 was already "old" but was still an amazing car. Freshmen year of college came, and I of course had to leave the car (freshmen weren't allowed to park on campus.) For sophomore year, I decided to take the car, much to my parents chagrin. They then had to get a new car to replace the loss of mine.

Jump forward to the year 2005. I've been out of school for a year and a half. My poor car is now 12, almost 13, years old, and is definitely an old car. Unfortunately, this car has spoiled me, and I don't want just anything I can afford. I realize that I will not be getting an Acura replacement; however, I don't want to be driving a jalopy either. Of course, my dad has put all kind of restrictions on the car the new to me car: less than 30,000 miles, less than $15,000, imported (bad luck with American cars runs in the family). This car that is in my dad's head is very hard to come by, especially after Christmas when all the cars were bought as gifts. Added pressure: not allowed to drive my car back to New Orleans because the power steering rack is out. I leave for New Orleans on Friday; today is Wednesday. A little frustrated, a little stressed. Can it be done? We'll see.

Life in Box

Happy Boxing Day! Amazingly, I have spent the last week in a box, lost in the mail thanks to the US Postal Service, and still have access to internet, Christmas presents, family and friends, and food. All that truly is another story.

On to Boxing Day . . . for those of you who don't know, Boxing Day is the day after Christmas, but that's the only explanation you're gonna get. It's the day my family hosts our holiday party. Since it's technically the second day of Christmas, I guess it really is a Christmas party. Let's just say there's tons of food, tons of people, and it's an all around good time. Any reason for a party in the Abdelnour household is good enough reason to party.

Of course, I didn't mean to jump to Boxing Day without at least mentioning Christmas. Just like every other Christmas for the last 22 years, I woke up first. You don't want to mess with tradition. After wrapping a few last minute presents for my family, I was ready to go. Presents were good, and everyone seemed to like their's too. Mom and Dad got me some pilates classes. Kate made me a bear at Build-a-Bear with a shirt that says COLA hearts NOLA.. Hopefully, later blogs will be a little more interesting.